Differences between British English & American words

Clothes

British English	American English
Trousers	Pants
Pants / Underwear / Knickers	Underwear / panties
briefs/underpants	shorts/jockey shorts
Jumper / Pullover / Sweater / Jersey	Sweater
Pinafore Dress	Jumper
Vest	Undershirt
Waistcoat	Vest
Wellington Boots / Wellies	Galoshes
Mac (slang for Macintosh)	Rain Coat
Plimsolls	Gym Shoes
Trainers	Sneakers
Braces	Suspenders
Suspenders	Holds up stockings
Dressing Gown	Robe
Nappy	Diaper
Pinny / Apron	Apron
Polo Neck	Turtle Neck
Dressing Gown	Bath Robe
Swimming costume / Cozzy	Bathing Suit
Dungarees	Overalls
dressing-gown	bathrobe
bootlace/shoelace	shoestring
bowler/hard hat	derby

Funny Jokes

What is your name?

Walking through Chinatown, a tourist is fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. He turns a corner and sees a building with the sign, "Hans Olaffsen's Laundry."

"Hans Olaffsen?", he muses. "How in hell does that fit in here?" So he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman behind the counter.

The tourist asks, "How did this place get a name like 'Hans Olaffsen's Laundry?'" The old man answers, "Is name of owner."

The tourist asks, "Well, who and where is the owner?" "Me...is right here," replies the old man.

"You? How did you ever get a name like Hans Olaffsen?"

"Is simple," says the old man. "Many, many year ago when come to this country, was stand in line at Documentation Center. Man in front was big blonde Swede. Lady look at him and go, 'What your name?' He say,'Hans Olaffsen.' Then she look at me and go, 'What your name?'"

"I say Sem Ting."

Visit the barber

A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment - shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. - he placed the boy in the chair.

"I'm goin' to buy a green tie to wear for the parade," he said. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

When the boy's haircut was completed and the man still hadn't returned, the barber said, "Looks like your daddy's forgotten all about you." "That wasn't my daddy," said the boy. "He just walked up, took me by the hand and said, 'Come on, son, we're gonna get a free haircut!'"

My wife is missing

The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "You know, I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"

"Why?"

"Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere."

Funny Jokes

Try to explain women

A man dies and goes to Heaven. He gets to meet GOD and asks GOD if he can ask him a few questions.

"Sure," GOD says, "Go right ahead".

"OK," the man says. "Why did you make women so pretty?"

GOD says, "So you would like them."

"OK," the guy says. "But how come you made them so beautiful?"

"So you would LOVE them", GOD replies.

The man ponders a moment and then asks, "But why did you make them such airheads?"

GOD says, "So they would love you!"

Do you know who I am?

It was the final examination for an introductory Biology course at the local university. Like many such freshman courses, it was designed to weed out new students, having over 500 students in the class!

The examination was two hours long, and exam booklets were provided. The professor was very strict and told the class that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail. Half of an hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked the professor for an exam booklet.

"You're not going to have time to finish this," the professor stated sarcastically as he handed the student a booklet.

"Yes I will," replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing. After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except the late student, who continued writing. An hour later, the last student came up to the professor who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there.

"No you don't, I'm not going to accept that. It's late."

The student looked incredulous and angry.

"Do you know who I am?"

"No, as a matter of fact I don't," replied the professor with an air of sarcasm in his voice.

"Do you know who I am?" the student asked again in a louder voice.

"No, and I don't care." replied the professor with an air of superiority.

"Good," replied the student, who quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and walked out of the room.

Good & bad news

An old man visits his doctor and after thorough examination the doctor tells him: "I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?"

Patient: "Well, give me the bad news first."

Doctor: "You have cancer, I estimate that you have about two years left."

Patient: "OH NO! That's awefull! In two years my life will be over! What kind of good news could you probably tell me, after this???"

Doctor: "You also have Alzheimer's. In about three months you are going to forget everything I told you."

Accent on New Zealand and Australia

New Zealanders don't like it when foreigners tell them their accents are just the same as Australians'. And once you've been here for a while, you'll realise they aren't. Pick up some light-hearted tips about the accents of New Zealand English.

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New Zealanders like to think of their country as classless - a country where everyone has the same accent. They will admit that the Southland accent is a bit different, owing to the large numbers of Scots who settled there. Southlanders tend to roll the "r" sound in their speech. Of course, many Maori also speak English with a distinct accent - and the difference between their more staccato way of speaking and other New Zealanders is quickly heard. There are other differences, but before we look at these, I'd like to answer the question: 'Why do New Zealanders and Australians sound so similar when they are separated by a sea that takes three hours to fly over?'

The answer, although not widely advertised in New Zealand, is straightforward. The first English-speaking settlers of New Zealand were Australian seal-hunters from the penal colony of Port Jackson (Sydney). Later settlers were mainly British. The New Zealand accent grew from an Australian foundation spiced with inputs from the different regional accents of the British Isles - English, Scots, Welsh and Irish.

So, what are the sounds in their speech that make New Zealanders sound like New Zealanders?

The first sound that comes to my mind is one I noticed a few days after arriving in New Zealand. I was standing in a queue at the bank listening to the young woman behind me. I wasn't eavesdropping you understand - I just couldn't avoid hearing what she was saying. She was talking to her friend about the "cheek" she was getting. I soon realised that she was neither talking about a part of her anatomy nor about someone's sarcasm towards her. She was talking about the cheque (U.S. check) she was there to collect. There is a tendency in New Zealand English to shorten the long 'e' sound found in beg, said and leg, into a short 'ee' sound of the type found in seek, leak or peak. So when a New Zealander tells you to do something 'ageen', you know they want you do it 'again'.

It's worthwhile pointing out that this tendency to shorten the 'e' sound varies widely between speakers - and, to my ears, is heard more often in the South Island than the North Island - but this might just be my impression.

To illustrate the second difference, I'd like you to cast your mind back to an old favourite from children's 'learn to write' books, the infamous "The cat sat on the mat". The pronunciation of this sentence might seem straightforward enough to you - lots of "ah" sounds of the type a doctor might ask you to make during an examination. To a New Zealander, however, the doctor is entirely absent from consideration. In fact, a New Zealander will say, "The cet set on the met". If you haven't noticed this before, listen out the next time you hear a New Zealander speaking and you'll hear it.

Moving on again, the next two sounds that come to mind are found in both New Zealand and Australian English. The sounds are best illustrated by a joke. The scene is North Africa, at the height of fierce battles in World War 2. An Australian junior officer meets a British senior officer on the front line. "Good morning young man," says the British officer, "Did you come here to die?"

"No Sir," replies the young Australian, "I came yesterday".

To British ears, our heroic young Australian would sound like he said "Oi kime yester-die". The butt of the joke here is how, to British ears, Australians (and New Zealanders) pronounce "day" as "die" and "lay" as "lie," etc so that "today" becomes "to die". Of course, British people with a Cockney accent also come close to pronouncing "day" as "die" and the Cockney influence is certainly the source of the sound in Australian and hence New Zealand English. The way in which 'i' becomes 'oi' is very much more an Australian pronunciation than a New Zealand one. Some New Zealanders can sound very Australian in this regard - for example Helen Clark, the current Prime Minister of New Zealand. I'm not quite sure why New Zealanders vary so much in this - it doesn't seem to be a regional variation.

Finally, the true clincher to decide whether you are listening to an Australian or New Zealander lies in the pronunciation of the letter "i" in the famous fish and chips test.

If your companion likes eating "feesh and cheeps," he or she is Australian.

If, on the other hand, they prefer "fush and chups," you are undoubtedly dealing with a New Zealander.

Have fun.

تفاوت لهجه کانادایی و آمریکایی - Canadian Vs American

Canada America

An American will say, "Hot day!" A Canadian will say, "Hot day, eh?" meaning "It's a hot day, isn't it?"

This is something deeper than spelling or pronunciation. It goes to the heart of the less-assertive Canadian character. The United States was born when Americans revolted against King George III and asserted their independence. Canada never came to a similar point of self-assertion and that little word "eh?" is their refusal even to assert that it's a hot day without inviting somebody else to verify it.

One definition of a Candian is "a North American who refuses to join the revolution".

Another way to tell the difference between a Canadian and an American is to invite the suspected Canuck to lunch and watch him eat. If he's really upper crust, he'll eat like an Englishman, with knife and fork held firmly in his right and left hands. He'll cut with his knife, pack the results on the back of his fork and convey the food to his mouth with the fork still in this left hand.

Many an American eats with knife and fork, too, but in a different way. He takes the knife in his right hand and the fork in his left to cut up the food. Then he puts the knife down and takes the fork in the right hand to convey the food to his mouth.

A common garden-variety Canadian does the job differently. He doesn't use his knife at all, except for particularly stubborn steaks and other such tough foods. Instead he takes the fork in his right hand and leaves the knife beside his plate. Then he cuts the food with the edge of the fork and feeds himself with the fork held in the same hand.

But suppose all these tests are inconclusive. There's one more, rather dangerous, way to tell a Canadian from an American. Just remark to the suspect that Canadians and Americans are so much alike that it's hard to tell one from the other. If the person involved is an American, he'll probably agree.

But if he's a Canadian he'll let you know, in no unterms, that you're wrong. And that stubborn sense of difference is one main reason why the two countries, despite similarities, remain separate.

(I'm pretty sure I agree with the last statement, but I'm not too sure if I like being called a wimp that doesn't even dare to assert that it's a hot day. (Which it is today.) And I'm tremendously relieved to know that I'm upper crust when it comes to eating.